Thursday 26 September 2024

I've turned a corner

I've turned a corner...... My latest ear worm... I just want to share it with the fabulous team at Oncology but luckily I don't sing it, I just smile and think it. What a fantastic bunch of professionals these people are, I'm in awe every day I enter the building. 

I was going to try and get this song on the radio. Well deadbeat radio. It's ringing like my tinnitus and I'm not sure if it'll lead into the chorus from yesterday but I'm loving how chilled the song is....
I've turned a corner....
And the world now looks... so very different to me 

And your point is caller.  ... 

Yes just another cheesy lyric that I've probably heard so many times before.... Ooh, that's the line...


I've turned a corner....I've turned a corner

And the world, now looks, very different to me

 I've turned a corner 

I've turned a corner

Unlike the times before, I feel, I finally see

Ok caller, what do you see, in your magnificent Epiphany. I can almost hear the rhyming couplets before you sing them you dafty, it's so derivative.

Eh, I'm going to see a mountain with a goat,  silhouetted against the setting son and yes, I'm going to become the greatest of all time.

Ok caller, last chance have you just seen Paul Weller play the castle and you've been listening to a jam album from 40 years ago.

Eh, and suddenly I see the goat is actually not alone and there's others and in the silhouette I see a blade being lifted as if the goat is going to be sacrificed.
Sorry Caller, that's your epiphany, see ye later, who's on line 3 

I've got a song as well.

Ok and that's enough of the Deadbeat radio call in let's listen to Life Support and The penny drops as the mushroom rises, A love story of .... Who writes this drivel?

So today it's me. It's Wednesday and we are off on the bus. I've walked to the meadows bus through town then walk from Stockbridge. I claimed the wee hill and have this beautiful view. So good I've taken more pictures than I've put up.

My energy levels are superb and I'm looking forward to the Wednesday chat with the nutritionists. It's such a great insightful look into the professionals here at the Western, every day is a school day. If only I remembered all the questions I want to ask. They're so prepared it is brilliant. They have their script, they've seen my bloods they are all over it. I have my head and it's full of nonsense so I usually just blabber rubbish and think afterwards, missed opportunity, good question for next week.

Today will be different. My throat is raspy and the swallows a bit uncomfortable but I'm eating. I prefer drinking but I can and do continue to chew and challenge my throat. 

After radiotherapy and a wonderful chat with the radiographer about the Portuguese way I headed on towards the nutritional professionals. I got a gold star when the saw my weight and heard my tale. If your body needs 7000 calories then that's what you need to do. All the water and all the cheesecake, ice cream, shakes and wonderful soups tick all the boxes. Challenging the throat with texture, like the pakora I'm having tomorrow is also a blast. Challenging with spice is pointless pain so I'll stick to tasteless shovelling. 

Tasteless shovelling is something most people would think I'd perfected during a life of eating everything including pizza boxes on a very greedy day. 

Whoever said there was no nutritional value in cardboard never tried it, I'd also say.

I'm thinking I had 5 pints of Guinness 20 days ago and wondered whether it was too early to try one tonight. I've largely not worried about drinking as I'm exhausted after tea and all the sweets.

I waited until Dad had enjoyed his cottage pie then finished the rest of it. Nothing tastes but I shovel it in like I've always done. It's pretty straightforward, food is fuel, diverse if possible, but don't buy the taste the difference, you won't. Buying 19p tins of peaches make as much sense as anything else. They're soaked in a light syrup, aka, sugar, that'll do.

I bought some mull cheddar from mellis last week. Still can't taste it. I can smell it fine, but no taste so leave it to Jackie who says it's lovely. I've tried eating it while holding the block under my nose. It's an option but I doubt it'll catch on.

After more cheesecake custard and peaches I'm done. I can't move because I'm knackered. Eating can be exhausting after an hour and so Guinness can wait and apologies beckon. Maybe Friday I'll have post dinner determination.

I was up at 4am for my Weetabix and then toothpaste and mouth guards. A lot more blood coming up, I must ask the docs if I should spit or swallow. I'm happy with either but not sure which is preferable.

This mornings session of Reflexology and reiki was another level again. It seems the more beat up my body gets the more beautiful the treatment becomes. My whole body seems to come alive in such a random way. It can be a point on my shoulder or forearm and I just feel this energy go through me. No idea how it works, care even less to find out, just so glad it transforms me. I had water every 20 minutes again and it really is little sips now. Glugging a pint glass in 5 seconds is long gone. I'm good for 20ml in that time.


As the bus whirls it's way through town I'm reminded of the old days when the buses stopped everywhere and I'd walk up castle street to work. I'm guessing that's the last 70's and 80's. It's different now and so am I. I've always thought, back then through to now, that the shops are just so random in town. There might be less tobacconists and off licences but occasionally or particularly in Stockbridge bespoke wine shops have appeared. They probably sell cigars. That would be a triumph of the 80's, I chuckle to myself. I'll have to venture in and ask what bottles of Port they have. I can talk about my Portuguese Camino and the wonderful boat I never took up the river from Porto.

So it Zapping and Doc today. I've to ask about the green juice, it's actually a mouth wash but ask I must ask I'm running low. I've also got to get some tips for pain management next week. 

I just had the 6 paracetamol yesterday and dropped the diahysrocodeine. It didn't make much difference except a lot more blood this morning from the throat. That may just be coincidence as the treatment ramps up. It's #14 so I'm supposed to feel shit and luckily between Jackie, Caitlin all the outrageously professional team as oncology, the post match Cafe Gallo experience and all the pals it's going good. 
In fact I'd say it's going great. I'm down to 2 fingers from 4 and yet I'm still eating. My thrush has gone, my bloods are good and the ulcers sing like heavenly angels.

Thursday has been a very good day and tomorrow is the end of week 3.

I remembered to get more mouth wash too. So pleased to remember something unprompted.


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